I was asked in September and then again in March if I would be willing to speak about my trips to Romania at Arkansas City's First Church of the Nazarene. Of course, I said yes. Saying yes in March typically means that I will procrastinate until I have to do something. Maybe procrastination is not the right word...I want to tell people what God wants to tell me, not just what I want to say. So I started getting some pictures put into a PowerPoint show and some goodies to put out to show a little of Romania.
On Friday I still wasn't sure what I was going to say. Insecurity hit me like a ton of bricks. I started to question everything...quitting my job, selling my house, and seriously, what do I know about being a missionary, anyway? Knowing that I tend to be someone who withdraws when hurt, afraid, or angry, I called a friend...one who doesn't pull any punches and her advice: talk about your passion. So, I wrote out a little script for the slide show to help calm my nerves. Sunday morning a friend called to pray with me before I went to speak and during most of Mr. Slaughter's children's service I prayed for God's words to be the ones that come out of my mouth.
I spoke; I lived; I went to lunch with a precious family from the church. And I realized the image in my head of evangelism (or missions), is that of Billy Graham or Luis Palau standing in front of thousands of people sharing the Good News. But that's not what God has called me to do. It's much more personal. In Romania (and here), teaching English gives these students a skill that can improve their life. It also gives me a chance to ask questions: what are your thoughts about family? leadership? God? holidays? What do you think learning English will help you do? become? And then, I can share how God took those same questions in my life and changed me.
I told the church, being a missionary is about being vulnerable in your story; sharing your brokenness and being real with the issues that seem like they strangle you. And, using those struggles to show how God is changing you for the better. Often, those struggles in your life are what God uses to draw others to Him. Once I remembered it's not about me, it really is about Him and my willingness to be used by Him; I realized this IS what He is calling me to do: Reach others for Him by teaching English.
A few prayer requests:
Dumnezeu sa va binecuvanteze! God bless you!
On Friday I still wasn't sure what I was going to say. Insecurity hit me like a ton of bricks. I started to question everything...quitting my job, selling my house, and seriously, what do I know about being a missionary, anyway? Knowing that I tend to be someone who withdraws when hurt, afraid, or angry, I called a friend...one who doesn't pull any punches and her advice: talk about your passion. So, I wrote out a little script for the slide show to help calm my nerves. Sunday morning a friend called to pray with me before I went to speak and during most of Mr. Slaughter's children's service I prayed for God's words to be the ones that come out of my mouth.
I spoke; I lived; I went to lunch with a precious family from the church. And I realized the image in my head of evangelism (or missions), is that of Billy Graham or Luis Palau standing in front of thousands of people sharing the Good News. But that's not what God has called me to do. It's much more personal. In Romania (and here), teaching English gives these students a skill that can improve their life. It also gives me a chance to ask questions: what are your thoughts about family? leadership? God? holidays? What do you think learning English will help you do? become? And then, I can share how God took those same questions in my life and changed me.
I told the church, being a missionary is about being vulnerable in your story; sharing your brokenness and being real with the issues that seem like they strangle you. And, using those struggles to show how God is changing you for the better. Often, those struggles in your life are what God uses to draw others to Him. Once I remembered it's not about me, it really is about Him and my willingness to be used by Him; I realized this IS what He is calling me to do: Reach others for Him by teaching English.
A few prayer requests:
- God would be glorified at camp
- Students would be drawn to Him through the love they see we have for them
- Health for staff and students
- My house to sell
Dumnezeu sa va binecuvanteze! God bless you!